rants&musings
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
6 days since i last blogged. sure has been a long time i guess. nothing much has happened as usual. end of term is approaching. really a great relief. but then again promos and PW looms again. urgh. not good omens they are..
darryl was chasing the sun at 21:02.
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
i am simply very vexed and irritated by the amount of politics that takes place in singapore schools, especially junior colleges. it is extremely so when you're on the receiving end of it.
darryl was chasing the sun at 21:26.
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
eeks. my eyesight has worsened quite dramatically. 100 degrees in a year is quite scary. in the end i had to spend $170 on lens + frame. yups. collecting my new glasses on thursday afternoon. chose a frame that hopefully suits my face shape (something squarish. yup). just hope i don't look too ancient.
been doin a fair bit of soul searching and thinking with the help of wq. wonder what i'd do without her bluntness sometimes. would i still be trapped in delusion all the time? would i still be an asshole most of the time? it's time to change, and prolly only for the better..
darryl was chasing the sun at 22:53.
Sunday, August 21, 2005
what a hectic week. so many events to plan for, so many things to do. did a powerpoint presentation for the guitar seniors farewell party. many pple said it was quite a good job, perhaps i should upload it somewhere for all to view? the only problem is that the file is 28 megs in size. haha. will take years to download i guess.
exhausted. been having mood swings like crazy. one moment i'm happy then the next i'm all down again. argh. nothing seems to help. kinda sucks. i have a fear i'm really going to lose my mind soon. yet i don't think i need psychiatric help. it's not that serious after all.. think i'm over-reacting again as usual. sheesh.
had lunch at carl's jr marina square outlet today. quite a welcome change from burger king and mcdonalds and the like. the burgers are huge. so huge one combo meal costs $9.70, but then again the size and taste makes up for it. drinks are refillable so that isn't too bad too. (: try it out if u must.
crap. physics spa tmr. and not to forget promos are slightly more than a month away. :S
darryl was chasing the sun at 20:33.
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
blogging from the school library. its been boring so far and i expect it to be boring the rest of the day. yawn.
think i'll place a password filter on this blog soon. it's far too risky to leave it open to all. apologise but it is a neccesity for my safety. so yeah. (:
darryl was chasing the sun at 09:22.
Friday, August 12, 2005
my gosh. i just realised i messed up my physics practical AFTER i left the lab. argh. and its not a data collection error. its a calculation error! forgot to calculate the period of oscillation (since i roughly got about 4-5 oscillations for a period of 20secS). so my graph is screwed big time. and its counted for CA.
argh. oh wells. its over. i'm thankful it isn't SPA..
darryl was chasing the sun at 20:56.
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
blah. how nice.. just wasted much of the long holiday. wasn't that bad though. did go out and have fun. hehe yesh. will blog more soon (:
darryl was chasing the sun at 20:33.
Friday, August 05, 2005
whoa. this week has been so exhausting. so much has gone by in the past week that i can't even stop and think through properly everything that has taken place.
been keeping late hours in school lately. been reaching home at around 7pm earliest. the only consolation was on wednesday. reached home at 5, if that's early by anyone's standards. sure is tiring. quite exhausted currently cos i've been reaching home around 8pm the past 2 days.
had a SIF international students symposium to attend over the past two days as well, on the topic "the asian century : possibility or pipe dream?". various speakers from all over Asia came to speak on their views on diverse subjects such as the rise of India and China, whether Singaporeans are heartlanders or global citizens, and the link (haha well you get the drift). tiring, yes, but enriching at the same time..
performing for the national day concert on monday. i'm so done for. can't play the song properly. urgggh.
darryl was chasing the sun at 21:03.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
i am so FUCKING pissed. call me sensitive, call me paranoid, whatever. what happened today during a particular tutorial merely reaffirms what i suspected all along. why does incidents of such nature always happen to me? i simply cannot understand any longer. why why why?
shall elaborate. during that particular tutorial, we were subdivided into groups by picking colour-coded ice-cream sticks. happened to pick a yellow-coloured one. some other person also happened to pick up another stick of the same colour. when the envelope containing them passed around that person (lets call this person X for easier reference) again, X replaced the stick with another of a different colour. sign of trying to avoid me i predicted. i kept quiet.
what happened next was really the catalyst. another person Y, said to a person in my group, Z, loudly across the room "good luck". it doesn't take a smart person to realise what the connotations are. it was so idiot-proof and so blatant that i really got pissed off. i kept quiet again.
i don't want to kick up a fuss. i don't want to make mountains out of molehills. i don't see the point in doing so. what's the use? it will probably result in these people avoiding me even more. why waste energy and waste time over something so trivial? however what happened today really made me feel angry and hurt. like i said this isn't the first time this has happened to me. and its not that i want it to happen as well.
in a nutshell, what's going on has made me realise that i should appreciate even more what i currently have. i am indeed grateful for the close friends that are ever-so-present in my life. i can forgive but it will take time to forget. if these people (who cause the problem) are out to make my life hell, all i can say is that they will never succeed.
i am so angry yet i don't and probably won't show it.
darryl was chasing the sun at 21:25.
Monday, August 01, 2005
bahh. the feeling that everyone in the world is against me has set upon my mind again. this sucks. why am i always thinking this way? i know something is wrong, definitely. and what happened today at a particular bus stop further reinforces this notion.
perhaps i shouldn't be typing this out in case the people read this (however unlikely). if you want the nitty gritty please contact me. urgh. this is horrible.
darryl was chasing the sun at 21:44.